As far as im concerned, I've been through quite a rough patch this time of the year. I was in love and it felt like heaven when it happened, but when it ended, i'm not sure that even hell could hurt me more than that, but i'm good. Life's like that, i won't let the negative side of the break up to affect me in the bad ways, on the positive tone though, atleast it has matured me on who to trust and when to trust someone. Everything needs to be done more appropriately this time around, everything needs to be trustworthy, and if they mention the word "perfect", it has to be about us.
You see, the thing about being in a relationship is that, we are never ready for the heart breaking part, since we are only in it for the true admiration we have for each other in the first place. Noone wants to forge a partnership, only for it to dissolve after months of hardwork, noone wants to leave the place they are so used to, noone wants to let go of the hands that fit theirs perfectly, and noone wants to attend the burial of the love they kept so long inside, so why does everyone want to fight?
I can't explain the trend, and i if had one wish, i wish for the happiness that a couple shares, is only for theirs to keep, not for any other stranger that could come knocking the door to the hearts of any of those two who are supposed to be in love with only themselves. Everything can be fixed, arguments can be resolved, just as long as you have the patience to do it. It's true that the heart minds what you feel, but it's the mind that tells your heart of what to feel. For me, it's how far you would go for someone, it all depends on your mentality, and if i ever had one advice for you, it is that you do not give up so cheaply. Just bare the cost until you can't wallet the emotion anymore.
I was in love before, and i'm sure that i will be in love again, and when the time comes, i'll never contribute enough reasons for the other half of mine to even contemplate of leaving because this time around, Holly loves me for all the obvious reason, the reason is always ME, and me alone :D
Edited:
Shout out to my boy, Hazrul and the lovely lady of his, Happy One Year Anniversary, i hope that it stays for thousand more years to come.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Sunday, November 16, 2008
THIS IS NOT FOR YOU, JGN NAK TERASA LEBIH2 YE?
Afternoon,
It's around 1240 now, i just took my bath and now I'm stuck in front of the computer, thinking of what to do. I suppose i could just let all my feelings out in one post, but I'll fucking eat myself if you read it and smile, and thinking that i wrote it out for you. I just cannot be bothered about you anymore, when one day i would stumble upon you, I'd spit the ground you walk on because I'm done worshiping it because your gods are made from China which is why you forked out fake prophecies. (referring to the statement of: "i worship the ground you walk on")
I should not be mad, but sometimes the level of ignorance in some people can be very devastating. You see all we wanted to do was to be able to make you smile (again? ), but if smiling wasn't enough for you, you could have just said it, but you chose to turn to a backstabbing ass snakes with friendly grins. I went to bed yesterday, hating your guts, your lies, but hoping that when i woke up, all of that would just be gone as usual, but it did not and stayed. But that's okay, you don't need to say sorry, it's my heart that needs to be apologizing to for all the times my mind managed to charm it with all the lies that you created. Thank you. You are one species that i hope extinct.
So this is how i sum up my day, I'm all well though, it's just that, narrow minded ass fucks bother me big time sometimes. Hmm i wrote this one for no one, i took no prisoners in the words i mentioned, i hope everyone lives their lives well cuz i don't want to be attending funerals some time soon. Lol. I'm just upset that things didn't go my way for a lot of reasons, i could not complete my studies, 6 months ahead of schedule, because of these absent minded fucks who supposedly hired to help the students, troubled us more. Bodoh, susun lah jadual tu elok2 lain kali, now i'm stuck doing 3 subjects from my intended 4. You see the thing is saya ade lagi 11 subjects, and since ni short sem, saya nak buat sem ni 4 subjects, and the other will be done in the long sem, and then i'm gone. But for the reasons said above, IM FUCKING PISSED OFF.
Lol, i'm not mad, i just wanted something to write about. Big ups for the visit.
Thank you, i love you all
*Edited
This is also a shout to my best friend's Mom, get well soon Auntie, your son loves you and misses your cooking. I love you bro. This is for you Hazrul. And btw, Lulu baru kasik bday present kat saya, which is a Dunhil Pure perfume, thank you Lily, even if kau slalu menyampah ngan aku, just know that kat cyber ni, kau sorang je perempuan aku sayang. MWAHH.
It's around 1240 now, i just took my bath and now I'm stuck in front of the computer, thinking of what to do. I suppose i could just let all my feelings out in one post, but I'll fucking eat myself if you read it and smile, and thinking that i wrote it out for you. I just cannot be bothered about you anymore, when one day i would stumble upon you, I'd spit the ground you walk on because I'm done worshiping it because your gods are made from China which is why you forked out fake prophecies. (referring to the statement of: "i worship the ground you walk on")
I should not be mad, but sometimes the level of ignorance in some people can be very devastating. You see all we wanted to do was to be able to make you smile (again? ), but if smiling wasn't enough for you, you could have just said it, but you chose to turn to a backstabbing ass snakes with friendly grins. I went to bed yesterday, hating your guts, your lies, but hoping that when i woke up, all of that would just be gone as usual, but it did not and stayed. But that's okay, you don't need to say sorry, it's my heart that needs to be apologizing to for all the times my mind managed to charm it with all the lies that you created. Thank you. You are one species that i hope extinct.
So this is how i sum up my day, I'm all well though, it's just that, narrow minded ass fucks bother me big time sometimes. Hmm i wrote this one for no one, i took no prisoners in the words i mentioned, i hope everyone lives their lives well cuz i don't want to be attending funerals some time soon. Lol. I'm just upset that things didn't go my way for a lot of reasons, i could not complete my studies, 6 months ahead of schedule, because of these absent minded fucks who supposedly hired to help the students, troubled us more. Bodoh, susun lah jadual tu elok2 lain kali, now i'm stuck doing 3 subjects from my intended 4. You see the thing is saya ade lagi 11 subjects, and since ni short sem, saya nak buat sem ni 4 subjects, and the other will be done in the long sem, and then i'm gone. But for the reasons said above, IM FUCKING PISSED OFF.
Lol, i'm not mad, i just wanted something to write about. Big ups for the visit.
Thank you, i love you all
*Edited
This is also a shout to my best friend's Mom, get well soon Auntie, your son loves you and misses your cooking. I love you bro. This is for you Hazrul. And btw, Lulu baru kasik bday present kat saya, which is a Dunhil Pure perfume, thank you Lily, even if kau slalu menyampah ngan aku, just know that kat cyber ni, kau sorang je perempuan aku sayang. MWAHH.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Senang senang di rumah
Greetings, beautiful children.
Harini aku tak buat apa2, lepak kat kj the whole day, gi makan ngan Izzaz, pastu balik seperti biasa lah, tido lagi, demam dah okay, cuma pening2 lalat skit lah, but other than that, im fine i guess. Watched Tropic Thunder at home yesterday, and Gosh, it was reallyyyyyyyyyy out of this world, real joy to watch. Gile original k Ben Stiller punye idea, kelakar nak mampus. And today i saw Step Brothers, not as good as the former, but otherwise, it killed my time, good to watch with friends with you.
I'm watching the news now as i write this, and it shocked me to find out that 5 lives were taken away in USA, all because of one man , an architecht who had his job cancelled off, went berserk in his old office. I must say that when the economy goes bad, it really undermines the sanity of the good fellows. It's hard to explain the trend, but bile duit makin kurang, makin naik la crime rates ye, so i really hope that things will turn out good for us Malaysians nanti.
Okay, nak tengok berita balik, i know i sound old, but i don't give two fucks about you. :D Later
Harini aku tak buat apa2, lepak kat kj the whole day, gi makan ngan Izzaz, pastu balik seperti biasa lah, tido lagi, demam dah okay, cuma pening2 lalat skit lah, but other than that, im fine i guess. Watched Tropic Thunder at home yesterday, and Gosh, it was reallyyyyyyyyyy out of this world, real joy to watch. Gile original k Ben Stiller punye idea, kelakar nak mampus. And today i saw Step Brothers, not as good as the former, but otherwise, it killed my time, good to watch with friends with you.
I'm watching the news now as i write this, and it shocked me to find out that 5 lives were taken away in USA, all because of one man , an architecht who had his job cancelled off, went berserk in his old office. I must say that when the economy goes bad, it really undermines the sanity of the good fellows. It's hard to explain the trend, but bile duit makin kurang, makin naik la crime rates ye, so i really hope that things will turn out good for us Malaysians nanti.
Okay, nak tengok berita balik, i know i sound old, but i don't give two fucks about you. :D Later
Thursday, November 13, 2008
This is how i write tonight
I wrote half of these rhymes 2 years back, and i decided to alter it a bit. This is dedicated to ...
Introduced you to my whole being when i was with "another",
It was immensely regretted that i got to know you after,
Broken up and gotten over, it's funny we still haven't talked much,
Pour respect like liquor on tombstones but with the lack of your touch
I left counting the months i projected to get you, oh is this a failure?
Knew for a fact that if i was a "hammer", i wouldn't be able to "nail" ya
Now how many more days could i go through without expressing this?
Because my heart is on strike, as it continues to run and oppressing me
I was pressing your digits, hoping you know that today i had called
Hung up when you had answered, my day's completed - shit that's all
I hardly see you with a dude, well if i did, i would not acknowledge
Apart from getting through, you're the main reason why I go to college
Your existence melts me down like porridge, leaving my heart burnt
But you couldn't hear the sound from the pain that my heart yearns
Insane- that's how i describe the day i murdered the fear of having us
Guilty- but i took the charge with all smiles because loving you is a must.
Big ups for the visit. Be in love.
Introduced you to my whole being when i was with "another",
It was immensely regretted that i got to know you after,
Broken up and gotten over, it's funny we still haven't talked much,
Pour respect like liquor on tombstones but with the lack of your touch
I left counting the months i projected to get you, oh is this a failure?
Knew for a fact that if i was a "hammer", i wouldn't be able to "nail" ya
Now how many more days could i go through without expressing this?
Because my heart is on strike, as it continues to run and oppressing me
I was pressing your digits, hoping you know that today i had called
Hung up when you had answered, my day's completed - shit that's all
I hardly see you with a dude, well if i did, i would not acknowledge
Apart from getting through, you're the main reason why I go to college
Your existence melts me down like porridge, leaving my heart burnt
But you couldn't hear the sound from the pain that my heart yearns
Insane- that's how i describe the day i murdered the fear of having us
Guilty- but i took the charge with all smiles because loving you is a must.
Big ups for the visit. Be in love.
This is how i intend to move
السلام عليكم
(curi dari cik crissie ye? :D )
Anyways mari kite lihat jauh mana kite dah sampai. Hari ni hidup aku lebih banyak tido dari berfikir, bangun kul 8.30 pagi, dimana 2 jam sebelumnya, aku baru habis melayan kerenah sahabat-sahabat handai yang ingin tukar jantina dan memulakan sesi pillow talk ye? Aku hanya tersenyum melihat telatah Amin, room mate kesayangan aku, Hazrul, rakan ku yang tak pernah jemu membuat ku tersenyum tika aku hanya mahu padam suis senyum itu dan Fifie, baby boy dalam gelung kawan aku, yang sentiasa menggelabah tak kena tempat. Dieorg bagi nasihat macam-macam kat aku, dan aku bersyukur akan kehadiran setan setan di neraka cyberia ini, because if it wasn't for them, i would have been lost right from the beginning. Bak kata french words, Salute' untuk kamu semua!.
Since the new semester has started, aku ambik French as my third languange and itu lah sbb aku bangun seawal 8.30 pagi untuk bersiap ke kelas jam 9 dan tamat pukul 11,
Antara apa yang aku dah belajar ialah macam mana nak introduce kan diri, okay biar aku try.
Bonsoir! ---> ini untuk cakap Good Night, kalau pagi is Bonjour
Je m'appelle Amir Iqbal ----> I am called Amir Iqbal
Je suis Malaision -----> I am a Malaysian
J'habite a Cyberjaya----> I live in Cyberjaya
Je suis ne a Kuantan, Pahang----> I was born in Kuantan, Pahang
Comment tu t'appeles? ----> How you are named?
Enchante' ------> Nice to meet you (Ini untuk lelaki yang gune)
Enchantee'------> Ni untuk perempuan gune.
Un homme ------> Men ( nak pronounce is annom)
Une femme ------> Women (younfam)
Une fleur ----> flower ( younflu)
Hahaha mesti berbelit lidah nak sebutkan, well itu lah apa yang jadi kat aku dan syimi tadi, nak terputus urat lidah ke anak tekak okay, :D so anyways, i'm good, still demam, i'll write something tonight, just tunggu k?
Laters.
(curi dari cik crissie ye? :D )
Anyways mari kite lihat jauh mana kite dah sampai. Hari ni hidup aku lebih banyak tido dari berfikir, bangun kul 8.30 pagi, dimana 2 jam sebelumnya, aku baru habis melayan kerenah sahabat-sahabat handai yang ingin tukar jantina dan memulakan sesi pillow talk ye? Aku hanya tersenyum melihat telatah Amin, room mate kesayangan aku, Hazrul, rakan ku yang tak pernah jemu membuat ku tersenyum tika aku hanya mahu padam suis senyum itu dan Fifie, baby boy dalam gelung kawan aku, yang sentiasa menggelabah tak kena tempat. Dieorg bagi nasihat macam-macam kat aku, dan aku bersyukur akan kehadiran setan setan di neraka cyberia ini, because if it wasn't for them, i would have been lost right from the beginning. Bak kata french words, Salute' untuk kamu semua!.
Since the new semester has started, aku ambik French as my third languange and itu lah sbb aku bangun seawal 8.30 pagi untuk bersiap ke kelas jam 9 dan tamat pukul 11,
Antara apa yang aku dah belajar ialah macam mana nak introduce kan diri, okay biar aku try.
Bonsoir! ---> ini untuk cakap Good Night, kalau pagi is Bonjour
Je m'appelle Amir Iqbal ----> I am called Amir Iqbal
Je suis Malaision -----> I am a Malaysian
J'habite a Cyberjaya----> I live in Cyberjaya
Je suis ne a Kuantan, Pahang----> I was born in Kuantan, Pahang
Comment tu t'appeles? ----> How you are named?
Enchante' ------> Nice to meet you (Ini untuk lelaki yang gune)
Enchantee'------> Ni untuk perempuan gune.
Un homme ------> Men ( nak pronounce is annom)
Une femme ------> Women (younfam)
Une fleur ----> flower ( younflu)
Hahaha mesti berbelit lidah nak sebutkan, well itu lah apa yang jadi kat aku dan syimi tadi, nak terputus urat lidah ke anak tekak okay, :D so anyways, i'm good, still demam, i'll write something tonight, just tunggu k?
Laters.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
This is how i intend to smile
All is not well on the other side of my story.
Saya pulang ke cyber ahad lepas, new semester dah start and to tell you the truth, i was not entirely excited about coming back due to unforeseen circumstances that i am not allowed to reveal here. Well i'm back being single, and i can finally tell you this that, saying that puts a smile on my face, because i went into an uphill task on trying to save us, but when i fell, i have these familiar faces around me, telling me that i'd be okay sooner rather than later, in which i did. and i have every reason to thank you guys for that, for the patience you guys put up with me for each time the sky turned grey on my other side of the world.
So Crissie has a blog now and updates it daily, a loving boyfriend, a loving family and that's exactly the reason why she always has this lovely smile. Shout out to awk ye, sbb tak sabar2 nak baca blog saya. Zaria is still loved by me, even if mood swings die kadang2 menakutkan saya ye, saya sayang awk okay, that's enough reason for anything to work out, hehe konon2 gempak la tu sayang saya pada angah. Jangan marah2 tau, nanti saya bunuh diri kang.
Tapi one thing for sure, banyak mende yang jadi that went out of hand, and for every reason you guys think i'm involved in that, i'm sorry, I don't owe anyone an explanation, i know the grounds i stand on and i wish for the best for the friends i've known to love these last few months. If you remember every second we were together, you'll come to your senses that i am still the guy who dreams of an island vacation as promised 2 weeks ago. If anything, just negotiate, jangan lah jump trus to the conclusion for things i know nothing about, or that i know something, but it's never mine to question it in the first place. Do not jeopardise our friendships just because it did not work out amongst the few of us, you have the digits, call me.
Btw, welcome to my blog, i'm not feeling well, i'm on medication and i need to sleep.
LATERS MOFO
Saya pulang ke cyber ahad lepas, new semester dah start and to tell you the truth, i was not entirely excited about coming back due to unforeseen circumstances that i am not allowed to reveal here. Well i'm back being single, and i can finally tell you this that, saying that puts a smile on my face, because i went into an uphill task on trying to save us, but when i fell, i have these familiar faces around me, telling me that i'd be okay sooner rather than later, in which i did. and i have every reason to thank you guys for that, for the patience you guys put up with me for each time the sky turned grey on my other side of the world.
So Crissie has a blog now and updates it daily, a loving boyfriend, a loving family and that's exactly the reason why she always has this lovely smile. Shout out to awk ye, sbb tak sabar2 nak baca blog saya. Zaria is still loved by me, even if mood swings die kadang2 menakutkan saya ye, saya sayang awk okay, that's enough reason for anything to work out, hehe konon2 gempak la tu sayang saya pada angah. Jangan marah2 tau, nanti saya bunuh diri kang.
Tapi one thing for sure, banyak mende yang jadi that went out of hand, and for every reason you guys think i'm involved in that, i'm sorry, I don't owe anyone an explanation, i know the grounds i stand on and i wish for the best for the friends i've known to love these last few months. If you remember every second we were together, you'll come to your senses that i am still the guy who dreams of an island vacation as promised 2 weeks ago. If anything, just negotiate, jangan lah jump trus to the conclusion for things i know nothing about, or that i know something, but it's never mine to question it in the first place. Do not jeopardise our friendships just because it did not work out amongst the few of us, you have the digits, call me.
Btw, welcome to my blog, i'm not feeling well, i'm on medication and i need to sleep.
LATERS MOFO
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